Beauty

This past couple weeks God has unveiled so much to me, i wish i could explain it all but my thoughts are all over the place. I guess I should start at the beginning. (this isn't an easy subject for me to talk about) My whole life I've never been happy with how i look. WOW what a surprise, a girl who doesn't like how she looks! nothing new. Now this problem never got to the point where i would hurt myself to make myself look better, but it was where Satan used verbal abuse to hit me hard, from other people and from myself. I would look in the mirror and pick out the little things that i didn't like and wished to change. Even thou i didn't think it did, but by doing that to myself it tore me apart from the inside out. I HATE how females do that to themselves. We are God's beauty. But anyway in my Christian life i have only heard God's voice speaking to me 3 times in my life. the first was "I LOVE YOU" the second was "YOU BELONG HERE" and the third one happened this past week. I was dealing with my self image (Satan was hitting hard) and it hurt so bad. We (friends from my floor) went to praise gathering on Wednesday and the topic was the pain in our lives and the moment i got in the sanctuary i knew God had something planned for me that night. I remember praying my heart out, my pain, my torment and my suffering. I gave it all to God, trusting him and than i heard him say "YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL" and i broke out in tears.........I don't know how to explain what i felt like that night but I've been changed by those 4 words and i wont go back to how it was.